Fried

See, by the time I get to my day off, I am so tired that I can barely think enough to write anything worthwhile. I have so much to say, and no brain power left to say it coherently. Life musings may have to wait until I get home.... I am substituting with another brief update of my life here:

> I learned how to do my hand roll in kayaking. That means no paddle. Just your hands and (the most important part,) your hips. Obsession complete. I may be able to go kayaking with a friend from my Wilderness First Responder class before I leave for Spain. Success.
> I literally cannot believe that I have been here for almost seven weeks. And that I have just over three weeks left. The thought both makes me incredibly excited and incredibly sad. I am trying to do what is so often difficult for me: to enjoy where I am, when I am.
> Over the last few weeks, I have noticed myself getting more and more selfish. It is becoming harder and harder to spend my free time with my campers, instead of sleeping or reading or being by myself. I literally sleep in the same room as my campers, so alone-time is almost non-existent. It is also becoming harder and harder to put my co-counselors before myself, and to think of how tired they must be before I consider how tired I am. We have definitely reached the part of the summer where we find the end of ourselves, and we throw in the towel completely, or we give in and let Jesus be our strength for us.
> On the topic of strength: I was struggling a bit this morning when I found a letter in my laptop bag that a friend wrote me at the end of the school year. I re-read it, and was so humbly reminded that I am often too strong for my own good, and that weakness is where God does the most in us. And through us. So this point of exhaustion and the incredible temptation to check out and stop giving my campers all I've got? It is beautiful, because it is here that I will stop getting in the way and Jesus will shine the brightest.
> I am incredibly blessed by my friends here. I have learned so much about what godly men and women look like, and how they are meant to love each other. This is so very clearly where I was meant to be this summer.
> The blue ridge mountains are beautiful, and the view from on top of Table Rock is one of my favorites. I also love Asheville. If I do not live in Boulder, I'll probably live in Asheville. If I stay in the U.S. at all...
> My tire exploded last week. Literally, exploded. Luckily, Moe and Jason came along and put my spare on for me, and I managed to get a new (and by new I mean used) tire for $75. Not too shabby.
> The one thing I miss most is my little house in Nashville. I miss my room (which isn't currently there anymore, but in my mind it still is) and my chair, with all my books. I miss curling up in my chair and reading until I fall asleep. I miss my roommate and jumping on her bed and talking until we fall asleep. I miss cooking and baking and having people over. I miss my favorite coffee shop, and buying groceries and going on climbing adventures with my dearest friends. I love it here, but these are a few of my favorite things...
> The hardest part of camp has become teaching classes... I loved it at first, but now I have done the same thing at least 100 times. And I am teaching little kids about climbing when I'm used to teaching college kids. There are crazy safety rules. I struggle with not being able to teach the way I want to, and having to teach all the time without actually getting to do any climbing myself. It may be a bit selfish, but it makes it hard when you have to spend ten weeks talking about how great climbing is, without ever getting to do it.
> There is more that I will tell you about later, but my brain is currently fried...